Don't Forget to Care By Julie Donley, RN ~ Success Expert & Author of <http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0976560542?ie=UTF8&tag=nurturingyour-20&li nkCode=as2&camp=1789&creative=390957&creativeASIN=0976560542> Does Change have to be so H.A.R.D.? 'Care' or compassion is an essential ingredient in the profession of nursing as well as many other caring professions. Without compassion, you might as well come up with another name for "nurse" because without "care" it's not "nursing". But it's not just nursing that requires compassion, or caring professions for that matter. Everyone you interact with over the course of your day has the right to some level of respect. Oftentimes, people are so focused on their own agenda that they forget they are dealing with other human beings with their own agenda and priorities. There is a consequence when compassion is missing so don't forget to care. You Make an Impact When you are angry, irritable or unhappy, and you allow your emotions to drive your behavior, there is an impact: 1) Your emotions are a distraction. It can cause you to make mistakes as you are so self-absorbed that you have difficulty focusing your attention on your clients. You neglect to empathize because you do not have the mental bandwidth and may not provide the necessary compassion or respect required. The conscious mind can only focus on one thing at a time. If you are emotional, then you are not able to think clearly. "When your emotions take over, your mind gets left behind." 2) Your relationships may suffer from outbursts or negative emotional energy. People can 'sense' your emotional state, so even if you have very little interaction, there is still an impact to the other person and it feels uncomfortable. When you are so upset that you cannot focus or you are too busy thinking about all you have to accomplish, you miss out on those moments you could share in a meaningful experience. How you spend the time with clients and coworkers make for memorable experiences. If you forget to care, the person will remember how you made them feel and that it felt bad. 3) These negative emotions are stressful and drain your energy dry. You leave work at the end of the day exhausted. Your mind has been working overtime on maintaining the negative thoughts. It takes a lot of energy to remain angry! It is not a natural state; something has to trigger it and then you must "tend it" to maintain it over time. It's a lot of work! Every human being has an innate need to feel valued. Respect means to value, so, in order to see the value in others, you must treat them with respect. When people do not feel valued or respected, it can cause anger and depression. It can increase feelings of loneliness and despair and can contribute negatively to them. Empower Yourself with these Four Strategies 1) Manage your emotions and your mood. It belongs to you. Decide the kind of presentation you want to make to the world and the kind of experience you want to enjoy as you greet people along your journey. Choose to be your best. 2) Focus on what you CAN do and what YOU can control; let go of what you have no control over. This is a huge relief! Much stress is harbored by focusing attention on trying to control that which you have absolutely no control. You can only control you - your thoughts, your emotions and your behavior. 3) Trade each moment for something of value. By staying present in the moment, you focus on what is right in front of you rather than holding onto anger over the past or what you don't have or frustration about the future and all you have yet to do. Be here now. 4) Let go of expectations. There can be a huge disconnect between the kind of work you want to deliver and the kind of work you can deliver given the current situation. You can only do the best you can do and on some days, well, you just get by. But when you do your best and you are respectful, when you care about others, even when you are busy, they will respect that and appreciate what you give them. People understand. But people are not as forgiving when you are mean. It is disrespectful to treat another human as a problem or annoyance and there is no excuse to treat another human being disrespectfully. When you disrespect others, you disrespect YOU. When you forget to care, you are also not caring for yourself. Care about yourself. Be the best you can be - just for today - it's all you have anyway. Do the best you can do; make someone feel good, pay attention to what your client or coworker might need. Don't ignore them because you cannot give them what you (or they) want; give them what you can and they will be forever grateful. Julie Donley, MBA, BSN, RN knows firsthand what it means to conquer adversity. Having overcome addiction, a grave illness, divorce, single parenthood, obesity, indebtedness and being laid-off three times, Julie brings a wealth of experience to her work. Tired of life being SO hard, she went in search of an easier way. What she found was quite intriguing: "Hard or easy, it's how you think about it!" Julie has worked in psychiatric nursing since 1993 and founded her company, Nurturing Your Success, to empower you to achieve your goals and work through change by educating, inspiring and motivating you to succeed. She is the author of several books including Does Change have to be so H.A.R.D.? <http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0976560542?ie=UTF8&tag=nurturingyour-20&li nkCode=as2&camp=1789&creative=390957&creativeASIN=0976560542> and The Journey Called YOU: A Roadmap to Self-Discovery and Acceptance <http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0976560534?ie=UTF8&redirect=true&tag=nurtu ringyour-20&linkCode=xm2&camp=1789&creativeASIN=0976560534> and is named one of the top 100 thought leaders in personal development. For resources and to learn more, visit www.NurturingYourSuccess.com. Contact Julie at [email protected] to have her speak at your next meeting or conference.